The Future of Baby Steps
“I didn’t just grieve for the child I lost, I grieved for the entire life I had envisioned with them” -therainbowinthestorm.com
Baby Steps Foundation started as an idea, a way to support, to guide and to really make an impact to families and women of loss. We wanted to change the silence, the taboo, the lack of conversation around pregnancy and infant loss. We wanted to give more insight into what we are trying to do at our foundation and goals we have that we would love to bring to the surface.
First and foremost after Sydelle lost Bostyn, she craved more time. Not like any time would ever be enough, but the opportunity for more she didn’t get. Raising funds for a CuddleCot for St Joseph’s hospital was a must for us. That way future families of loss would automatically get the opportunity to extend their time if they chose. This is the main goal for funds raised at our 5k in October. Sign up today! We would love to see you out there.
But what else could we do to support in our area?
So many ideas have came to fruition, so many opportunities have been presented our way.
One day when Sydelle was visiting Bostyn at the cemetery where half of her ashes are laid, she saw a grave marker that had a little girl's name on it and the date of death shook her. The little girl had passed away when she was 2 years old and the date of death was in 2017.... 2 years that baby had not had a proper headstone, only her birth and death date in a plastic picture frame, grass growing around it. Finances for a funeral, headstone, cremation, burial, etc. are not something you plan when you’re pregnant; not usually something you’re even remotely thinking about and can shell shock a bank account. At Baby Steps we want to be able to offer families the comfort in not having to struggle financially to give their child what they want, providing headstones and cremation or burial costs is on our list of to dos.
After Bostyn died, Sydelle and Jt struggled with the fact they would never know her, watch her grow, get bigger, be provided nutrients to thrive. But they wanted a tangible visual of that. A tree was planted for Bostyn in the very corner of their yard, outside of their kitchen window and seen by any part of their yard. It will grow and bloom alongside Bostyns birthday. Baby Steps would love to be able to provide the same gift to families, if they want a tree to plant in their yard for their child’s memory, to enable them the chance to see growth year after year, be able to nourish and care for the tree as they would their baby.
Understanding and comfort from others that know this loss, have the same experiences, that are walking the same struggle is survival. When Sydelle came home from the hospital, talking to other loss mamas, and still to this day checking in with them, all over the country has been the greatest help. To understand “crazy” feelings, and navigate very dark trenches with those that have felt the same. We are in works with Channing Baby Co.-- a business local to Tacoma, Washington-- to provide a biweeekly support group, led by Sydelle herself, to mamas of loss. This group we want to differ from the ones organized by the hospitals- as from Sydelle's experience can be hard to get through, led by someone who hasn’t experienced this and don’t provide the extra hand holding that loss mamas we need. Baby Steps will be able to fund a support group, provide journals of healing, hope, and feelings, and to ensure every member is given resources they need in addition to the group-- whether that be therapy, yoga, meeting with a nutrition/healthy living guide or massage.
BIG GOAL, we would love to eventually be able to provide a mini retreat once a year for mamas to get away, relax, recoup, talk about their babies, check in with themselves, ground where they are and figure out what areas in their process can be aided. We know that life will never be the same for women of loss but we hope to help guide and support.
We thank you for helping make our hope for Baby Steps a reality, to continue to meet our goals and to be able for us as founders to say okay what’s next. We want to always grow, always provide and always reach new level of support. Baby steps Foundation has so much potential and we couldn’t do it without those who believe in our mission. If you have any questions about anything we are doing, or have other ideas of ways we can provide support, please reach out! We love to hear from the community, especially fellow loss mamas. We are in this together!